Homebirth Miscarriage Birth Plan - Sufficient Grace Ministries

Download a printable version of the miscarriage birth plan here:
SGM Miscarriage Homebirth Plan

To find local support or online support, contact one of our SGM Comfort Doulas here.

To request Dreams of You comfort items or a miscarriage kit, click here.

Homebirth Kit and Birth Plan

Four to fourteen week miscarriages at home
(created by Nicole Fortune, SGM SE Ohio Regional Coordinator)

What is included in the kit and why (more detailed explanations will follow)

Raspberry Leaf Tea – May help induce labor.
Heavy Maxi Pads (Do not use tampons)
Reusable Coffee Filter – To hold underneath your vagina on the toilet to catch what is being delivered or to retrieve from the toilet.
Red Mesh – Place between the toilet bowl and toilet seat to catch what is being delivered but allows blood and urine pass through.
Clear Container – To place baby in.
Saline Solution – To put in the clear container with baby.
Wooden Box (Or Small Casket) – Use for a memory box or burial.
Fabric Squares (Or Crocheted Wraps) – To wrap baby in or decorate box.
Rubber Gloves – To wear while retrieving from toilet and/or cleaning off baby.
Dreams of You Care Package – A memory book, a bear to hold, reading materials, support contact information.

Additional items to have and why

Support Person – It is unwise to deliver your baby alone, someone should be with you.
Phone – In case of emergency.
Camera – Take pictures.
Sheet of Tinfoil/Plastic wrap/Wax paper – A place to lay, clean off and look at your baby.
Tweezers/Toothpicks – To clean off baby.
Clear Glass Container – Filled with saline solution it can enhance baby’s features so you can view him or her more fully.
Water – It is important to keep hydrated.
Gauze – Use in lieu of a towel/wash cloth, softer. Can also be placed between baby and fabric/cloth/wrap to absorb fluid & moisture.
Towels – To catch/clean up fluids.
Music/Comfort Items

Things to expect

You will experience labor. You are giving birth. Many women are surprised by the intensity of the cramping/contractions. Using deep breathing exercises can help you relax and cope with the pain. Heating pad, ice pack or a rice sock can be used for hot and cold therapy to bring relief.
Bleeding & cramping/contractions should begin within two weeks of the death of your baby, but may take longer. Drinking raspberry leaf tea (included in the kit) may induce labor naturally. Do not use a douche or an enema. Labor will reach the height of intensity right before the birth of your baby. At this time, and for the first hour after baby is born, bleeding may intensify, but you should not fill a heavy maxi pad sooner than a half hour. After the first hour, bleeding should begin to lessen. If you are bleeding more heavily than expected (filling a heavy maxi pad sooner than one hour at a time), call your doctor. Sometimes bleeding will stop entirely for hours or even days before returning.
The placenta will likely be expelled in berry-sized pieces throughout labor. If your baby is born in their amniotic sac, he or she may appear to look very similar to the pieces of expelled placenta. Small, fleshy, pieces of discharge are probably pieces of your uterine lining.
Know your baby may be physically unidentifiable. Depending on when your baby passed and other factors, your baby’s condition upon delivery can vary. They may not be born fully intact or they may be born intact and very easy to identify. There have been cases where babies, even at very early gestations, have identifiable features, including nose, ears, hands, feet, and eyes. Other times it is hard to determine baby from the placenta and clotting.

What to do

Hold the reusable coffee filter (included in the kit) underneath your vagina in the toilet bowl to catch everything that is being delivered. And/or place the red mesh between the toilet bowl and toilet seat to catch what is being delivered but allow blood and urine to pass through. It is easier to identify your baby if you catch everything as it is delivered than it is if you retrieve everything from the toilet.
Lay out the sheet of tinfoil/plastic wrap/wax paper on your bathroom counter or any flat surface. When your baby is born, place baby on the foil/wrap/paper. Use tweezers, toothpicks or your fingers to gently clean your baby off and move them. Toilet paper, facial tissue, paper towel and cotton swabs will stick to your baby’s fragile skin and may cause tearing.
Physical changes happen quickly after birth. Placing your baby into the clear container with saline solution (both included in the kit) can enhance their features again and will preserve baby. The saline solution needs to be changed every 4 hours.
Name your baby.
Take Photographs.
Read or sing to your baby. Make memories.
When the time feels right, you can wrap baby in a piece of fabric/cloth (several included in the kit) or wrap and place your baby in the special box included or in a container of your choice. Putting a tiny piece of gauze under baby will absorb any fluids and prevent soiling of the cloth or wrap. It will also help stabilize baby. It is important to support baby when you move them, as little ones born in early gestations are quite fragile.
Invite family, friends, a spiritual counselor and/or anyone you’d like to come be with you and meet your baby. Please know some may choose not to see your baby. It is helpful to present baby in a cloth or wrap. A tiny teddy bear is included in the Dreams of You Package. This bear is the typical size of a baby born at 10-13 weeks. You can tuck the bear into the wrap with baby.

If you do not wish to or are unable to identify your baby

When flushing is unavoidable, consider writing a note to your baby on a small piece of tissue paper or toilet paper and flushing it with or after.
You can choose to bury all that is delivered even if you did not or choose not to see your baby.

If you need to transfer to the hospital

Bring everything you passed/delivered to the hospital. You can bring this in a plastic storage bag or another container and carry it in a shopping sack. Baby can come in the plastic container or the special box.
Bring a change of clothes and extra maxi pads.
Ask to take your baby home with you or for your baby to be returned to you after any testing. Many states allow for home burials and hospitals may be unaware of this possibility.
Bring a teddy bear (included) or blanket to hold.

After Care

Have someone stay the night with you.
Follow up with your OB.
You will have bleeding and discharge (lochia) for the next 1-3 weeks.
Be mindful of the signs of postpartum depression (PPD).
Talk to someone about how you are feeling. Consider joining a support group (local information included in kit).

Gestational weeks

4 weeks- Baby is considered a “blastocyst”; microscopic.
5 weeks- The embryo looks like a tadpole, and it’s the size of a sesame seed.
6 weeks- Your baby is likely about the size of a sweet pea. Your baby has microscopic arm and leg buds.
7 weeks- Your baby is likely about the size of a blueberry. The baby’s nostrils may become visible and eyes may be visible as dark round spots.
8 weeks- Your baby is likely about the size of a kidney bean, 1/2 inch long. The baby’s nostrils may become visible, eyes may be visible as dark round spots, you may be able to detect arms & legs.
9 weeks- Your baby is likely about the size of a grape, about 3/4 inch long. The baby’s nostrils may become visible, eyes may be visible as dark round spots, you may be able to detect arms & legs.
10 weeks – Your baby is likely to be about the size of a strawberry, about an inch long. Your baby may resemble the shape of a baby, the baby’s nostrils may become visible, eyes may be visible as dark round spots, you may be able to detect arms & legs, mouth & ears.
11 weeks- Your baby is likely to be about the size of a fig, just over 1.5 inches long from head to bottom. Your baby may resemble the shape of a baby, the baby’s nostrils may become visible, eyes may be visible as dark round spots, you may be able to detect arms & legs, mouth & ears, fingers & toes.
12 weeks- Your baby is likely just over 2 inches from head to bottom. Your baby may resemble the shape of a baby, the baby’s nostrils may become visible, eyes may be visible as dark round spots, you may be able to detect arms & legs, mouth & ears, fingers & toes.
13 weeks- Your baby is likely to measure about 3 inches from head to bottom. Your baby may resemble the shape of a baby, the baby’s nostrils may become visible, eyes may be visible as dark round spots, you may be able to detect arms & legs, mouth & ears, fingers & toes.
14 weeks- Your baby is likely to measure about 4 inches from head to bottom. Your baby may weigh about 2 ounces. Your baby may resemble the shape of a baby, the baby’s nostrils may become visible, eyes may be visible as dark round spots, you may be able to detect arms & legs, mouth & ears, fingers & toes.

Burial information

Contact your local funeral home, cemetery or SGM Support person to find out what options are available.
SGM can provide you with burial wraps, clothes, caskets, etc. free of charge. You can request items here.
Your local SGM Support person can provide options, local resources and help answer any questions you may have regarding how, where and when to bury your baby.